Sunday, February 22, 2009

Ack! Is it morning already?

Nermal probably wonders how humans can function after an all night partying binge.

I woke up freezing, curled up in a cocoon made up of two blankets that were infested with cat hair. One of them was the size of a bath mat and really had no purpose being on me other than keeping my feet warm. The pillow was nice and soft compared to the hard wood floor. The only thing missing from making this scene look more harsh was maybe a pool of drool next to my head on the ground. Then again maybe it was there and I hadn't noticed it? No, the pillow would have absorbed any of that nonsense. Sorry guys.

Agh, the sun is seeping into the room.

How did I wake up here? It's not a big mystery as I didn't drink. There was no fuzziness from booze only maybe from bad sleep. For the first four hours of the after party I had been sitting in a lazy boy like chair. Only it didn't tilt back. In fact it tilted forward. The back was curved and there was a person sitting on the floor in front of me. It was the only place on the floor that hadn't been taken over by the accidental beer swamp. It was because I was in this embryo like body position that I eventually crawled up out of the chair to sit on the floor where it was more comfortable. I would find a pillow and lie down. One thing would lead to another and before long with the help of a blanket or two I was fast asleep with the party going on around me.

Derek's Party Tip: One should be careful when doing this. You should know the people you're falling asleep around. If the people get too drunk they could step on you, fall on you, drop things on you, or worse case do things to you that you don't notice until you wake up (ie. Shave off one eye brow, put a potato chip in your mouth, put hot chili peppers down your pants - yeah, I saw slumdog millionaire).

There is also strategic positioning to think of. example: if you're sleeping on the couch, is the couch an active area? Where others night push you out of the way or join you and squish the lfe out of you because it's "comfortable"? People don't always use common sense when under the influence.

Perky is still going. Take that Energizer bunny.

By the point I was losing consciousness most of the people that were partying had gone home or to get laid. Only the hard core smokers and drinkers were left behind. Most of them were tired and didn't move around much. conculsion: sleeping on the floor was A-OK! One of them, Carl, was amazed that I could fall asleep in the middle of the floor. I told him it wasn't really such a big feat as I would be paying for it later on. I was sure of it.

aftermath on the coffee table

As the sun slowly crept into the apartment it revealed all the things that were hidden in the previous darkness, empties, cigarette butts, Nermal the cat... People were actually surprised to see the cat and were wondering where he was hiding all night. He was lying on the bed... in plain sight. It's things like this that you notice because you're the sober one.

Waking up in the clothes you were in the night before is not what I'd call refreshing especially if you smell like smoke. I've noticed this more with the longer hair. The hair seems to suck up all and every odor you come in contact with. I had to get out before I vomited. I'm not big on cigarette smoke.

I waited for Carl to down another beer then it was off to the Plucker.

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